Last year, I made the choice of not penning down my goals and aspirations for the year.
A stupid decision I’d say. One that will not be repeated.
At that moment in time, it felt right.
Lifeless; after months of endless studying, restraining myself at home and contemplating to start a papaya plantation, walking away from a relationship, having no plans to further my tertiary education as every alternative just seemed to have a flaw one way or another, and with National Service looming over me like a dark cloud, and all my friends seemed to be moving on as if life was mapped out for them.
There wasn’t a plan, nor a future that I could see.
And thus, 2009 is here with no resolutions to unfold. Sedih right?
I left year 2007 with a heavy heart, wanting to relish the moments again and again. Aimless like a cow in the meadows, dreading the impending future and wanting to go into a deep sleep and wake up a year later. Had zero plans for 2008. It seemed bleak and uninviting. Nothing was certain and the future seemed hazy.
I walked into 2008 absolutely certain it was gonna be hell of a year. Pessimistic much?
But no, I was left dumbstruck in awe how life unfolds and leaves us stunned in the wake of events.
2008 had been a really good friend to me. National Service wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, the idiotic moments we share I will forever remember. I've met super random people, and made a really great bunch of friends that I have been in and out of touch with, and I am now learning how to speak Chinese and take cabs to places around Setapak. No doubt, I’ve had my share of shitty moments, isolated more than once from the real world, having to fend of for myself, unfair expectations, being taken for granted, dealing with failure, infamous for constantly sleeping - but it is from significant events like this that laughs are free and I have grasp the concept of growing up and discovering who’s true and who’s not.
I do think that I’m slowly giving up pessimistic in favour of optimism.
But then again, I strongly believe that we should not waste time and energy on people whom do not want to help themselves. We may whine, grumble and point fingers in twenty nine different directions but it all boils down to us to make a change. Why I still insist on offering a helping hand, I donno.
Equally as important, we should not merely believe in what we see but what we feel. You cannot see friendship and love, you feel it. Am I right?
College has been taking me away from home more often that I want to. I am seeing less and less of my friends than I would like to. Nevertheless, I still am learning how to make up for lost time spent away from home grounds. I seem to be quite bad at it, but it is worth trying…
For all the crap memories and to the very memorable memories, 2008 was a good year for me, randomness and all.
As 2009 unfolds, a new chapter of my life is about to begin. Everyone will be busy with college and work. Exams, assignments and sorts. I may be far from home but always with me, I have the life lessons that I have obtained from 2008. And with that, I’ll make the best of the year 2009 that I know will have its share of delightful surprises :)
Here's to a Happy Two Oh Oh Nine, people!
No comments:
Post a Comment