I will try, but maybe it’s best to admit defeat before you are consumed by your own fallacy.

For the first time, I leave a lecture trying to push back the small tears forming in my eyes. Having to curl up in a cubicle to let them out in small weak sobs. To pace around my hostel buildings while struggling to keep my lips upright and still.

Because it was so insanely difficult. Without the proper understanding I am literally digging myself a grave. I didn’t think I could cope and my grades depend on it. And in some way, my overall happiness (currently) depends on it.

I feel so stupid. Not just because everything taught seems so vague but because I let such a silly thing affect me to this silly state.


Intimidation at its best.
And it is the ninth week already.