01 January 2010

25 Things I Ought To Have Told My 'Last Year' Self



(Ignore the grammatical error in the title)




1) Put that bar of chocolate down. Now.


2) That girl you’re lamenting about? She never changed. There was one time you almost had your perceptions flipped over but don’t be too quick to judge. Some leaves just can’t be turned.


3) You were wrong about college. It does get worse.


4) The unfathomable will happen. You will discover that you can study, to certain extents.


5) And guess what? You're actually good at it, even when you nitpick the crap outta it.


6) Girl, you’re highly unstable, have a knack of falling into longkangs and painfully bumping your head on the toilet flush thing. Watch out.


7) People will keep reminding you that you are lifeless and 'emotionally hollow'. Tell them to shut the hell up.


8) You become a serial House addict. (pun unintended)


9) Your year is obviously quite boring, since I'm completely running out of things to say.


10) You learn to procrastinate procrastination.


11) Humor, at least the conventional kind does not run in your veins. Deal with it.


12) Your socially inept behavior is often miscomprehended as snobbishness.


13) Read more. No, not more blogs, more books and the business magazines.


14) Stop being rebellious with everyone, tutors in particular. I know it exhilarates you, but stop. It’s unhealthy and not worth it.


15) And yes, you discovered the great garlic cheese toast.


16) In five months, you will have a new roommate and despite all odds, you’d wish for the current one to stay.


17) People come, people go. People are easily replaced, live with it.


18) Water balloon nights with the hostelians will be the most random thing all year.


19) You'll get your temper under control. Are you shocked? Me too.


20) Stock up on hair fall control shampoo babe cos you’d be dropping hair like jambus falling from the tree.


21) You'll find your soulmate.


22) Don't get so excited. His last name is Presario CQ35. And his first is Compaq.


23) Don't binge on honey stars at 3 in the morning when you’re down with flu. 'Cereal Puke' is not fun. At all. Seriously.


24) You need to make time for things in life that truly matter. What’s a string of As if you’re having dinner on your own on a Saturday night.


25) You will lose the ability to write. This is proof.


No comments: