18 May 2008

I'm a Lost Cause; Not A Hero

Merely four days ago, I touch touched down at LCCT after serving two months in National Service located in the deep jungles of Tuaran, Sabah. I bet none of you have seen it on the map, or for that matter, heard of Tuaran until now.

And in approximately Thirty-Eight hours, I'll be making my way to college's Mass Call.


Just about all my friends have already started college a long time back and is probably having the time of their lives. But why, oh why, am I so certain I'll hate it? Or more likely, not to fit in?...

It's a wild guess. An instinct. A prediction. Whatever it is, it's not making me feel an inch closer to looking forward to Tuesday.

SIGH.

I feel so unequipped, not to mention unprepared...? So far, I've only dumped in a towel and a few shirts into the very empty suitcase. Gah.

What is seriously wrong with me these days.

I blame it all on the NS blues.

On a random note, if the meal between breakfast and lunch is called brunch, then what do we call the meal between lunch and dinner? Just a sudden thought because I always seem to be eating at the latter time.

National Service, Sabah, and I.


How could you forget to pack sunblock? It's sunblock waaaay!
*smacks head*



My first week in Kem KK DiBawah Bayu was excruciating to put it bluntly. The days were spent doing nothing, waiting and waiting for the administration to distribute our clothes, settle into our respective dorms, getting our tastebuds accustomed to the crappy food, and uncomfortably interacting with other equally-suffering trainees.

My first meal; their idea of a welcoming lunch.

Nearly two weeks later, Character Building or Pembinaan Karakter classes commenced. We were separated into four groups, and you'll be stuck with these people for the duration of the PK classes. My PK class was awesome. Like really really awesome. Did I forget to mention PK classes have two parts? Module 1 and 2. PK classes are fun, if you’re a five year old that is. The activities are somewhat childish to the extend I felt as if I was back in kindergarten all over again. Soon after, the physical activities kicked off.





Five minutes later......

:)


Our daily schedule at NS goes something along these lines:

0430 - Wake-up Call
0530 - Assembly and Physical Training(PT)
0700 - Breakfast
0800 – Pembinaan Karakter (and later) Nationalism classes
1000 – Morning Teabreak
1030 - PK (and later) Nationalism classes resume
1200 - Lunch
1330 - Physical Exercise, i.e., Marching, Kraf Hutan, Navigation, Obstacle Course
1600 – Teatime

1630 – Aktiviti riadah
1730 – Shower/Rest
1930 - Dinner
2030 - Night activities (vary and keeps us guessing, mostly talks and movies)
2200 - Supper
2215 - Rolcall (I find this an ubber waste of sleep time)
2300 - Lights out

(I haven't inserted Malay prayers, you'd be amazed how much time they spend in the surau.)


Basically that's what we do every single day, except on weekends, where we do nothing in the afternoon for Saturdays and Sundays. Yeah, life is a routine. I survived it there withoutbitingsomeonesheadoff.

Take note of the number of meals we have. How can we not gain weight?...

And every 1st and 3rd Sunday of the month is Family Day, where your family is allowed to pay you a visit between 0900 until 1700 hours. You have no idea how much I dread Family Days, only because my family is about what..five thousand miles away?

Oh, and PT each morning differs. It varies from aerobics, Tempur Tanpa Senjata (TTS), poco-poco, or, it’s up to the trainers' preferences. On weekends, there's no PT (whoopsforjoy!). Eventually you'll settle down to the routine, and you'll learn to like the activities. And every Thursday and Friday night is Religion Classes, so each respective religion gets its own class taught by an outsider. Did I mention Buddhist classes are conducted purely in CHINESE? Yeah, I transform into a dumb frog every Thursday and Friday night.

And yes, I’ve been suffering cubical blues in that two months duration. You would think that after investing a huge sum of money here, they'd built bigger and better looking toilet cubicles and showers but, no. They have to make them all so narrow that we have to suck in our tummy just to squeeze through the door while cleaning the toilet walls with our backs and giving them a finishing polish with our hair. I'm still wondering how those, on the well, chubbier side actually make their way out and avoid getting stuck in between the door and toilet seat.

Or maybe, they avoid doing their business and wait until where they can finish whatever they have to do in comfort and peace, like me.

I did many many awesome stuffs in NS, I really did. Here are few of them :)


I camwhored with a police airforce helicopter.

Fly fox twice.
Accidentally volunteer to be a group leader.
Tried the sumazau dance.

Lifted a plane. Almost.

Changed race.

And later on, converted into Islam. My malay name is Fauziah. :)

Assist in smuggling Tuaran Mee into camp.

Sit by the longkang and kiwi my boots during midnight.

Boarded a navy ship. Thats as far as I got....

Happy to be eating camp food?

Made great plans.

Drank from a super huge coconut that onlt costed RM1.50!?!
Ate a cup of maggi in five minutes.
Memorized the Sabah Song by heart.

The awesome rickety bumpy bus rides we go thru every week.

Eat like I've never eaten before.

Putin means banana is bahasa Dusun.
Drank lake water.
Survived through weeks of Dizigui classes.

Got my buddy tulan-ed at me. It's not my fault I can juggle damnit.

Sleep in ceramahs.
Superspeed shower in four minutes, only becos there was no one else but me in the toilet.

Watch the sunrise every single weekday morning.

Got High? :D

Grabbing opportunities to sleep during morning teabreak between PK classes .

Not runaway and shriek my lungs out when I meet a lion dancer up close.

First hand experience at the Magunatip dance. Super cool wei.
Named a kerajaan after me.
My KN group named themselves, Szetoo's Smile. I was swelling with pride.

Trip to the Air Force.

See, touch, camwhore, and eventually use the M16.


To blog down my National Service experience would be impossible for I and only I went through it all. You weren’t in my sempit kasut kelas to do the ‘ke belakang pusing’ ten times in a row or run all the way back to the dorms to save our fresh laundry from the mean rain. And you will never get the chance to dance the poco-poco under the scorching sun in the famous spike boots that weight nearly a ton to a crowd of restless parents.


National Service is in general, a waste of time. All day long what we do is waking up early in the morning, masuk baris, star jumps, have freezing cold showers, washing clothes, bathe, eat, sleep, marching, sleep, marching, eat, whine, masuk baris some more, star jumps, get high blood pressure, marching again, eat, hantar dobi, sleep, shower, eat, and fret.... But why do people come back from National Service crying and saying that they miss and enjoyed camp? One word says it all: FAMILY; the friends that are made in camp are precious. We bathe together, we ate together, we slept together (literally), sama-sama pakai baju celoreng to sleep after getting punished, we even washed our undies together la.

I never thought I'd say this but, I miss camp.

16 May 2008

Honestly speaking,

I still am extremely unpatriotic after 2 months plus of being 'brainwashed', so to speak. However I did make a good many amount of friends from different races and places. It was quite sad leaving all my awesome Sabahan friends behind (especially the 3 other Sabahans-ans!)

We Subang people live in such luxury and we don't even know it. =/

NS has also made me appreciate the littlest things in life too like,

  • My washing machine. Oh man did I MISS my washing machine. I nearly hugged my washing machine when I got back.
  • Splendid food. (Fried fish SIX nights in a row….)
  • My bed. My very clean clean bed. Every day I have to hit the bed sheets on my bed because there's always some kinda bug on it and all the dust of the day collects on top of it. Plus, the girls keep stepping on my very nicely made bed just to open/shut the windows. Damn you.
  • My bathroom. My spacious, bug-less and BIRD-less bathroom. (More about this later.)
  • The heater. It is NO FUN bathing in ice-cold water when it's raining at four in the morning.
  • Privacy. I have not been alone except in the shower for the past two months. It is a LUXURY to have some space to myself.

Now I need to sleep on my wonderful soft bed which I've missed for months.

15 May 2008

Tales From NS

It is my pleasure and delight to announce that Szetoo Weishya is back on West Malaysian soil, polluted air, fast moving cars, and all.
National service is a place where we're all forced to grow up/mature in one way or another. It in fact does toughen you up.

For instants, I am a lot stronger and wiser about the weather because I've been washing most of my clothes with my awesome bucket for the past month. It is no joke washing those blue grungy thick NS towels and running back to the dorms when it starts to rain to get your clothes, especially when the dorms are yards away.


Weight-wise, I've been told that I've put on some. I think its becos' of the horrible food we have to eat more or less everyday out of hunger. There was one time where we had to eat fried fish for about a week. It's the same fish (full of boney bones) but with different sauces. There were days where the food was beyond dreadful so we'd bail on the meal queue and snuck off to purchase maggi cups or just hold our breaths and ate rice with soggy vegetables. :(


It's not ALL bad in NS though, really. I've picked up a couple of local Sabahan songs and made a lot of friends from different ethnic groups! The trainers are mostly Christians so they don't make our lives as miserable as other camps.

There have been instances of people seeing ghosts and stuff like that but I’m usually too tired by the end of the day to be scared. Okay, maybe now and again I do get frightened and we'll all huddle in the centre of the dorm with our blankets and jimjams. Lights out is at 11pm and the night guards on duty will knock on our dorm doors by 4am to wake us up. Then we'll have to be down in the 'padang kawad' by 5.30am for our Physical Training.


It's along story. I'll blog more and 'hurai' about it once I manage to upload all the pictures up.

P/s: Many many thanks to Eleanor Rigby who has been all this while updating this blog so....religiously? Haha :D

12 May 2008

Kepulangan Saya

Dengan sukacitanya, saya mengumumkan kepulangan Yang Berbahagia Szetoo Weishya ke dunia Selangor pada 14 Mei 2008. Di harapkan ahli keluarga serta sahabat handainya akan menyambut ketibaannya dengan penuh meriah dan *icantfindawordtoinserthere*. Oleh hal yang demikian, bersiap sedialah untuk mengalu-alukan kepulangan Szetoo Weishya yang telah berada di dunia Sabah selama dua bulan yang lepas.
Sekian harap maklum.
:)